Parang inaabuso naman ng mga babae ang VAWC kasi pabor sa kanila ang batas. Paano naman kami, wala ba kaming proteksyon?” This is the most common issue raised by most men, well, at least in our office, in VAWC cases. But is it true?
If we trace back the rationale behind this law, the Supreme Court, in the 2013 case of Garcia v. Drilon (G.R. No. 179267, June 25, 2013) discussed:
- that violence against women is deemed to be closely linked with an unequal power relationship between men and women, or the “gender-based violence.” Societal norms and traditions dictate people to think men are the leaders, pursuers, providers, and take on dominant roles in society while women are nurturers, men's companions and supporters, and take on subordinate roles in society. This perception leads to men gaining more power over women. With power comes the need to control to retain that power. And VAW is a form of men's expression of controlling women to retain power;
- that women are the usual and most likely victims of violence. According to the 2022 National Demographic and Health Survey (NDHS) conducted by the Philippine Statistics Authority, 17.5% of Filipino women aged 15-49 have experienced any form of physical, sexual, and emotional violence from their intimate partners. As of 2021, there were 8,399 reported cases of physical violence, 1,791 on rape, and 1,505 on acts of lasciviousness.
But looking at it from the men’s perspective, do women really take advantage of their alleged “free pass” of being regarded as the weaker gender, thus, entitled to be protected more than men? Is there even a “proper way” of using this law? Or is there a deeper problem that needs to be addressed?
In my observation, the reality is that most of the female private complainants are financially dependent on their husbands because they are usually stay-at-home mothers who do not have the opportunity to explore their careers and are instead left with the child-rearing and home-making chores. As a result, the husband tends to take control of the family and the wife just follows his orders. Being the person who has no say in the relationship (because of her financial dependency to the husband), she gets to be the one who takes all the hit, the blame, and the responsibility.
But what is problematic in these kinds of roles that our patriarchal society has normalized? The wife does not get to choose for herself on whether to focus on the family or advance her career since her role is supposed to be nurturing the family home which oftentimes is not regarded as important as providing for them, as in the role of the husband.
The standard that most of us grew up with is that men shall provide and women shall stay at home. While this has been the practice from the beginning of time, we also cannot deny that in our evolving society, this norm is not anymore thriving. Men and women can work together in nurturing and providing the family at the same time. Women should not be expected to always drop everything, including their jobs, when something goes wrong with the family. Women should not solely be the family’s emotional caretakers and problem solvers who are expected to put their professional growth on the back pedestal. This social structure undermines women’s abilities to pursue their ambitions without guilt.
Thus, to conclude, while it may seem that most women use VAWC ever so often to protect themselves, speaking from my experience, we cannot say for a fact that it has become an abusive mechanism. In reality, women’s use of VAWC is rooted in genuine fear and desire for independence and safety.
It happens. Some are reported, while some conquer silent battles. For all we know, day by day, even hour by hour, there is a woman being abused, be it physical, sexual, psychological, emotional or economic.
So, the answer is no, violence against women and children still persists.
